Tag: Mental Growth

Digital Exposure & Experiencing Nature -The Balance Our Children Need

Digital Exposure & Experiencing Nature -The Balance our children need!

 

One of the perks of working as a parenting coach and counselor is being able to pull from your own experiences, both as a father and of course as a kid. This forces you to realize just how much has changed since your childhood. As a latchkey kid who thrived on fresh air, Extensive Playtime, and family dinners, I look at today’s generation of tech-savvy tots and wonder when — and, more importantly, how — this transformation occurred.

Today’s childhood is getting trapped in a world of gadgetry!

My first “owned” Gadget was at 21. A cellphone shared by my sister  and me, but operated by my Father because ‘you all are young to use it and hey it is expensive!

The most telling difference between my childhood and the present, however, is today’s lack of time. Time to explore, time to experiment, time to be a child – which means, most importantly, time to play.

Mr.COVID having added to it all!

The Kids of the big cities and now rapidly increasing in Towns as well are living in a ‘citified’ environment- lack of connection with Nature.

A child, any growing child needs stimulation-

The Gadgets, The screens, The schools and even the parents are however becoming Overwhelming rather than stimulating to a child’s sensory demands.

The Child may have all the consumption but is steadily being devoid of the Engagement.

We are teaching our children how to make a living, but not life!

We’ve been telling them how we have made our way to the moon and back, but have trouble letting them meet the new neighbor.

This boon of ‘Digital Fidgeting’ has taken away the ‘Friendly Neighbourhood’.

Quite a Paradox is it not!

So, is there a way back from this? Should we reconsider?

Should we BAN the Digital world from a child’s life?

As a Parenting Coach, I have counseled and seen many cases where extremes have failed!

The answer one feels is in Division of the day, week, month.

Slowly and steadily compartmentalize the mind of the child to understand that the week is going to be designed into 2 parts.

Balanced between Boons of Digital Exposure to The abundance of Nature.

Children nowadays have many more opportunities to literally see the world than we had. In our time, we could only read about different countries and their culture through books. Now, there is digital media to support that experience and of course, not to mention the opportunity to travel and experience first-hand. so why not have a balance.

When you introduce your little one to animals and their sounds on the television, ensure you take her/him to the zoo to see those animals in their natural habitat and hear those sounds real in the next 2 days. This makes 2 days of both offering them Digital Exposure and Experiencing Nature.

When your child watches an animal animation fiction on the Tele, that same week Arrange for a trip to an Animal Café for her/him to feel the warmth and compassion of the animals of different kinds.

The above examples will ensure that a child will consume the ways and means of an animal kingdom, species, and their ways via digital boon and then experience the engagement when they visit such places and feel their sensory demands being satisfied.

A perfect example of balance and harmony of

Look, Listen & feel.

This can be tried in all aspects of the child’s interest. Now the child will know and appreciate the difference between learning from digital media and being and feeling in the real environment. The child enjoys and appreciates the worth of both aspects.

Woh kehte hain na, “ बच्चों को ये सिखाना चाहिए कि कैसे सोचें , ना कि क्या सोचें।

To me, this will create an environment for the child to recognize the balance between Consumption and Engagement.

 

-Santosh Bakhshi

A Life Coach & A Learning Father!

How to take care of your child’s mental health?

How to take care of your child’s mental health?

Living in the modern world, we all might have heard our peers’ discussing how emotional health is equally important as our physical health!

Well, it’s true. However, if you belong to Generation X or even if you are a Millennial, who is now a parent, you might relate to a lot of stuff discussed in this brief piece on mental health.

Remember the times when our hearts smiled more than our faces! Yes, I am referring to our childhood.

It was the time when innocence was the most prominent trait. Among our cousins and friends, there were occasional fights that lacked blame or ego.

A time when we used to play with toys that were not so electronic.

A time in life where the denial was mostly associated with “I won’t share my piece of cake or chocolate with anyone.”

A time so carefree… isn’t it?

While we grew up, every time somebody threw a No at us, most of us thought it’s such a blessing to grow up and live life on our terms. Little did we know of how much goes into living life on our own terms.

As we grew a little old and began experiencing the bits of life firsthand, we gradually enrolled ourselves for the rat race of making it big in life. Our spirits were then forced to carry the weight of performance and peer pressure.

Over time, these pressures and challenges lead to an understanding of the importance of emotional well being.

Would you like such a life for your child?

Definitely not! We all want our children to live a better life than ours and offer them the best possible support we can. Right?

Here, it’s crucial to note that just like physical health, emotional health is vital for the human body and soul.

Maintaining emotional wellbeing allows children and young adults to develop resilience to cope with whatever life throws at them and grow into well rounded, healthy adults.

Alarmingly, 70% of children and young adults experience a mental health problem such as depression, abuse, etc.

Most children grow up mentally healthy, but surveys suggest that many children and adolescents move towards depression and anxiety troubles. It has emerged to be a case because of the frequent changes in the way we live and how that affects a child’s experience growing up.

How can you maintain your Children’s mental health? 

1. Parental Help: Parents must have a warm, open relationship with their children. One essential job to be done is to pay full attention to your child and acknowledge their feelings. Reaching out and talking to them would help them avoid finding solace in harmful distractions like Smartphone’s, gaming, prohibited activities, etc.

2. Professional Help: A parental coach can assist and advise you to better understand your relationship with the child and provide you with the right tools to correct behavioural issues.

Let’s learn more about professional help.

Parent coaching sessions offer the progenitors with the tools required to handle nearly any situation in the family. The certified coaches are proficient in assisting moms and dads in creating a roadmap to:

● learn efficient ways to respond to scenarios instead of reacting abruptly

● imbibe ways to become patient and kind towards the child

● creating a calmer, happier, and more inviting environment for the child

● improve the overall relationship between parent and child

● learning effective ways to communicate with children of every age

● understanding the behavioural patterns and demands of children

We all are living in lifestyles that are busy and hectic. Reaching out for coaching helps solve prevalent issues and teaches parents the right way to deal with their child and avoid any arguing, whining, or bickering with them.

Each session provides techniques, tools, and strategies to handle specific family life issues. A coach avoids talking about the past and instead focuses all attention on now and the days ahead. With assistance, parents produce results by developing clear, concise steps to determine intentions, values, and goals for moving forward to a healthier family.

With every session, a parent can learn new techniques, strategies, or methods to handle specific family issues. A parent coach would always motivate you to focus on the future and avoid talking about the past. With the right assistance, you, as a parent, can witness fantastic results, leading to form a healthy and happy family.

While looking for your child’s mental health, below are some other aspects that can be worked upon are:

1) Maintaining good physical health, eating a balanced diet and following a regular exercise routine

2) Making them feel loved, trusted, understood, valued and safe

3) Making them learn and grab opportunities to succeed

4) Accepting who they are and recognizing what they are skilled at!

5) Since your child can test your nerves, attaining mindfulness will make you happier and let you manage anxiety, stress, and depression.

 

Author

Vishakha Goyal
Founder- LifeLitmus
IPA Expert, Parenting Coach, Access Bar Practitioner, Sound Healer

 

Guideline Before Looking for an Elementary School for Your Child

Guideline before looking for an elementary school for your child:-

 

That moment you heard of news that you are going to be a parent you feel blessed and happy but with a child, comes a lots of thing and one from that is responsibility. “The child future” and you start making plans for your child you look for a good insurance, you thought of child higher education, you thought of what child would become in future, and you also thought of which school he or she will go.

But before that when the child turn into 1.5 month or a 2 year a parent should start thinking of their elementary school. Elementary school plays a vital role for the child growth and development. It really important to know what you want for your child and I am here to share few points with you which you need to keep in your mind before searching for elementary school for your child.

  1. The Management: – It is really important to know who is running the school. The owner of the school itself running the school or the third party is involved in it. If the owner itself handling the school, nothing great than this. Background, education and the experience in the field of education of a director need to b keep in mind.
  2. Reputation of the school. Feedback creates the reputation of the school. So check or collect the feedback of the school from the Ex-parents and from the Social media like Google, School Facebook page. It will help you to take wise decision for your child.
  3. Meet the teachers in the school and let your child to interact with a teacher. The interaction between the teacher and a child the way she greet and treat your child will help you to access the school environment and the teaching staff.
  4. Play Area. Play area with swings, jungle gym etc. is must for your child and it should be an essential part of a school which you are looking for. Play area help your child to grow physically. It develop flexibility, speed, balance and leadership quality in a child.
  5. Ambience. The school and the classes should be colourful. It is a basic introduction of studies for a child. Bright colours attract the child attention and bring positivity in your child. Colours leave an impression in your child mind and make them more creative and imaginative. The classes should be airy and filled with sunlight.
  6. Children to teacher ratio. It is a significant aspect for your child to be perceptible in a class. Children teacher ratio shouldn’t be more than 15:1. Teacher attention at this age is much needed. This ratio is necessary for the overall development of your child to take care off.
  7. Safety and security. Again sending your child first time away from yourself whether it is for a moment or for hours it took your soul and for this safety and security is really a matter of concern. The investment made by school in safety and care of the children by CCTV, security and housekeeping staff make your decision easier.

Brands doesn’t matter, do not send your little bud into this competitive world at an early age. It is a time for your child to develop themselves physically, emotionally and socially, so set them free.

These are the points will help you to take right decision at a right time.

 

Vaishali Thapa

Parenting Coach

Help Yourself and Your Child Busting the Exam Stress!!!

Help Yourself and Your Child Busting the Exam Stress!!!

Parents easily get stressed when the exam time of the children draw closer. Exams can really be stressful for the entire family, but in reality, it needn’t be this way. It’s understandable that the child will experience stress and anxiety. If we as parents stress out, kids will stress out even more. Instead of putting additional pressure, there is a lot that parents can do motivate their kids for scoring well and prepare systematically for their exams.

Here are 10 practical and handy tips for the parents that will help them prepare their kids score well in the exams and reduce stress:-

  1. Know your child’s Exam time table – A very helpful way to help reducing yours and your child’s stress during their exams. Parents must know what exam the child has got next in order to help them prepare on time. It proves to be an extra element of support. You can simply add it to your calendar or pin a copy of the exam time table onto the notice board.
  2. Regular monitoring of their studies– Always take some time out to monitor your child’s progress. Sit with your child and design a schedule so that he or she has enough time for revision. Lending a helping hand in building a useful schedule for their days and weeks will help them efficiently utilizing their time. Don’t let them putting off all the preparation for the last days.
  3. Cut back on distractions– Any distractions, be it TV, gadgets, phones, gatherings, parties or even a disturbance from siblings must be avoided. It’s imperative to give your child the right atmosphere during exams to make him perform and score well. Try to allocate a comfortable room or a space in the home for your child to study in peace. 
  4. Do not compromise on child’s nutrition – Your Child health might get affected while dealing with exams pressure. An extra and special care is very much required keeping in mind the pressure child has on his mind. Adding fresh and seasonal fruits may do wonders for them. It helps them improving their concentration levels. 
  5. Enough sleep is fundamental – Be it school or exam, enough sleep is essential for a child to perform well. Teenagers have a habit of catching up on social media before bed which can cut the sleep time resulting in them being tired right before their exam. Prohibiting device in bedroom especially during exams or cutting off the internet is highly recommended. Installing parental control is also advisable during exam time.
  6. Help them to be active – Encourage them to take breaks between studies. As studying continuously will tire out the brain and affect the ability to retain knowledge. A power nap, stretching exercises, listening to music OR dancing can refresh and re-energize them.  Processed food, high caffeine or sugar intake can make kids anxious during exam days. Teenagers are recommended not to exceed 100 ml of caffeine a day.  Encourage them to take plenty of water.
  7. Never compare your child – Comparing your child with other kids, using negative words to demean them, or questioning their caliber on the basis of scores will just hurt the sentiments of the child. His true potential shouldn’t be measured with scores in the exams. Parents must remember that  exams are just one of the many challenges your child will face and it’s not the end of life. So, take it easy!
  8. Reward your child efforts- Rewarding your child is important to motivate them to put their best foot forward. Don’t bribe them with expensive gifts. A simple family outing or catching up with friends or cousins after the exam can help the child to take his pressure off.
  9. Identifying warning signs, if any – Its imperative to ensure your child’s mental well-being too. It’s natural to feel anxious during exams. But if there are signs of extreme anxiety, loss of appetite, anger issues or irritated mood, these could indicate that the child is not keeping well. Always keep a check, intervene and talk to them at the right time.
  10. Stay calm – Don’t build too much pressure on them. Stand in support of your child, believe in his abilities, help them preparing for the exams without overburdening them with your expectations.

So, stay calm! And if you can’t, fake it till you make it. Try to hold your stress inside and not to discuss with your child.

Hope these tips will help you and your child staying stress free in the days of examinations. These tips will not only help them coping with stress but will also form the right outlook for exams.

 

Author

Neetu J. Talwar

ESL Trainer and Parenting Coach from Deep

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

PARENTING BEYOND EXPECTATION

PARENTING BEYOND EXPECTATION

PARENTING MANTRAS FROM JIJAMATA-MOTHER OF SHIVAJI MAHARAJ AND MOTHER OF SWARAJYA’

 

What is parenting?  How does ‘nurture’ influence development of Child?

A greatest example of it is how ‘Jijamata’ brought up ‘Shivaji’ as the great warrior, inspiration for everyone even in today’s era. She herself was warrior, administrator and later mentor for her child.

It is said that- Why we don’t have ‘Shivaji’ again because still there is no ‘Jijau’ who can brought up the son like ‘Shivaji’. ‘Chatrapati Shivaji’ could not have been the same without her mother. Shivaji owes his greatness to the inspiration of his mother, who dedicated her life to upbringing him become greatest ruler.

What I understood is- Jijau must have been the only woman in the history who decided the purpose of her child’s life even before it was born.

While she was pregnant, every comfort be conferred upon her but she wished none of it. Rather she preferred to climb to the top of fort, wield swords, discuss political issues, put on amour and ride on horse …..It taught us that ‘GARBHA SANSKAR’ means not merely reading books but it is a process to imbibe all the positive psychological forces in fetus (‘Garbha’).

In Maharashtra, most of the women during pregnancy read about ‘Chatrapati Shivaji Maharaja’ because she wants her child to be like ‘Shivaji’ but she cannot decide what qualities of ‘Shivaji’ they want to be embedded in her child. Is it power / Strength?

No. there were many ruler that were more powerful than ‘Shivaji’, then what qualities that made Shivaji, the ‘Chatrapati Shivaji’ – blood pride for every Indian.

Below are the qualities that she imbibed in Bal-Shivaji…-

  • Jijau instilled within Shivaji sense of Duty, Courage and Fortitude (It is strength of mind that enables person to encounter danger or bear pain).
  • She embedded importance of Values and Dharma by telling him stories.
  • Pride and Respect– Shivaji fought for the pride of ‘Swarajya’. In his life, Shivaji maharaj never crossed the line between pride and ego. He was always down to earth, treating all peoples equally and respectfully. It’s all by seeing his mother doing so.
  • Foresight- Jijau taught him the strategies and to thought ahead of the time. Always to think about future impact of any decision and have solution ready in advance for the same.
  • She taught him ‘Art of Politics’ and prepared him to be an honest ruler.

 

Thanks to all the training from ‘Jijau’ that helped him to handle trickiest situation with ease.

Last but not least, she had major role in nurturing/ parenting his grandson ‘Sambhaji Maharaja’, the great warrior, Sanskrit Pandit and also author of several books.

The efforts of parenting taken by JIJAMATA helped to fulfill dream of ‘Swarajya’.

 

Nurture a child, for betterment of Society and Nation”  ….the parenting lesson we can learn from her.

 

Raje..I am willing to see you being sacrificed on battle field but I cannot afford to have a blemish that I gave birth to a son who had scarred and ready to take his own life out of fear.” -Maharani Jijamata [Sourse- Shriman Yogi]

 

 Author:

Dr. Pradnya Gurav [Consulting Homeopath and Parenting coach ..DEEP]

Moving from Digital to Development

Moving from Digital to Development

 

In today’s digital age, it is not very uncommon to find even toddlers using gadgets. Many parents try to please their children by giving them tablets and phones so that they are kept busy and entertained. But have you ever thought that a toddler needs more human interaction than with an AI?

A child’s early developing stage is until the age of 6. Hence, it is very essential that you do not let him or her be dependent on gadgets.

Do not forget that every child needs attention and gadgets are no substitution to it. Here are few things that you can do to help your child move from the digital to the development stage.

  • Get Real Games: 3D games are fun and attractive, but they also harm your child’s mental growth. So, instead of downloading a game on your tablet or phone, get your child a game appropriate for his or her age. Games which will help your child in learning and at the same time have fun with it.

 

  • Spend More Time with your Child: It is very important that you try to spend as much time as you can with your child. The more time spent with your child, the more disinterest your child will be with the gadgets.

 

  • Encourage Creativity: Every child at the toddler stage loves to draw (or should I say scribble). Encourage your child to be creative and let him or her draw or scribble. Appreciate your child for what he or she has created.

 

  • Get Them Involved: You may want to keep your child away from the household work, but the truth is by keeping your child involved during your household chores can help you interact with him or her better. It also makes it easy for them to learn quickly and easily.

 

Do not let gadgets hinder your child’s growth. Enjoy this stage with your child because time does not turn around.

 

Happy Parenting!!!

Arti A

Parenting Coach

 

BRACHIATION – A SIMPLE PLAY WITH MULTIPLE BENEFITS  

BRACHIATION – A SIMPLE PLAY WITH MULTIPLE BENEFITS

Do you remember when did you last brachiate or have motivated your child to do so? Well now what is this new term Brachiation, it is nothing but simply hanging and monkeying around on trees or on the metal ladders which we have in our park’s or playgrounds.

We hardly pay heed to such simple and interesting activities nor do we dig deep to know the science hidden behind it, have we ever given a piece of mind onto why such ladders were there on playground? And usual answer we get is to increase your height.

There are many benefits of brachiation apart from increasing the height. Brachiation is the ability to swing from rung to rung on an overhead ladder. It is considered one of the milestone like crawling, scooting, walking.

This activity is extremely easy for a very young child and extremely difficult for an adult.

10 most important benefits of the brachiation ladders:

  • Improvement of intelligence.
  • Extension of the rib cage. Greater thoracic extension means more oxygen for the brain.
  • Improvement of breathing
  • Increase in the strength of the hands and arms.
  • Help in the proper development of the back.
  • Decrease in respiratory diseases.
  • Better definition of the laterality of the brain.
  • Better development of manual skill.
  • Greater ease and dexterity when writing.
  • Improvement of visual convergence.
  • Optimal development of eye-hand coordination.

From the sensorial point of view, the brachiation ladder must be made of wood and never of iron, aluminum or plastic. Also with the wood, the hands do not slip.

Try to have one brachiation ladder at home instead of expensive mindless toys. Children will have an activity which could be one substitute to reduce screen time as well.

Happy Parenting and Happy Brachiating

Article by Dr Shraddha Tendulkar

Source of information and Courtesy: Glenn Doman’s book

Art Of Praising Your Child

Parents usually understand the need of praising child. But most of them don’t have much idea about the effective manner, timing and frequency of praising child. Studies and literature also have different opinion about this. Some experts recommend that we shall praise freely and lavishly, on the other hand few warn not to overdo the applause.

Both of the opinions seem correct as experts have strong premise to prove their argument.

First set of experts says it’s very important to praise children as it;

  • encourages them to improve
  • keeps them motivated
  • boosts their self esteem and confidence
  • helps get right behaviour repeated

Second set of experts warn not to praise too much because;

  • child will find it difficult to judge his/her work accurately
  • the more praise children receive, the more they rely on adult evaluations instead of forming their own judgments
  • they afraid to take risks and try new things for fear of not always being on top.
  • it can also lead to some children becoming overconfident
  • There is a great debate among experts about the effects of praise on children. This debate is not about praising or not praising rather difference of opinion is because of way of praise and amount of praise.

So let’s discuss five key points which will help us to draw a balanced approach.

1. Be Specific when Praising

Praise is much more than only saying “Good Boy” or “Good Girl”, be specific about what the praise is for. When you are not specific, they have a hard time understanding exactly what it is they have done well. Instead of saying “Wow, you did a great art work” say “Your choice of red & yellow colour has made this work great”

This way your child will also get to know that you are noticing his/her work, and will encourages him/her to do more.

2. Praise the efforts not only results

You can always point out improvement no matter how small e.g. “You really have picked up on your reading…Appreciate”. Highlight their effort “I can see you really tried hard to get it right”

If you are looking for improvement then you need to praise the efforts and don’t need to wait for results to praise. Praising efforts can encourage your child to try hard in the future.

3. Praise must be genuine and sincere

Keep it real: Don’t say, “Good job!” when it’s not. Even young kids can see right through false praise. Praise should reflect the amount of effort the child put in. Earned praise reinforces your child’s effort and is encouraging.

4. Praise the process/behaviour rather than the Child

“You’re such a good player” or “You have such a beautiful singing voice.” Be careful with this kind of praise which tends to focus on their inborn strengths/abilities. If he believes he arrived prepackaged with certain abilities, he might think he doesn’t need to improve in those areas.

It’s better to focus on process. In Process-based praise emphasize on what he can control, such as how much time he spends on a project or which strategies he uses.

“I am so impressed at how hard you worked on your science project” is more empowering than “Wow, you’re good at science !”

6. Praise in Public – Correct in Private

If you get an opportunity to appreciate your child in public, you can multiply the impact of positive appreciation. Praise in Public becomes celebrations for receiver, it creates that big impact. Choose to correct them in private because if you choose to correct in public it becomes criticism.

6. Accentuate the Positive

Respond to wanted behaviors of your child more than you punish unwanted behaviors. The key to getting great results is to pay attention to “what’s going right” rather than “what’s going wrong”

Try to eliminate constant negativity around and put the focus on all the wonderful, positive things your children are doing instead. Catch them doing right things and appreciate them immediately.

Praising your child is an art and you can master it by practicing above stated Six points.

Happy Parenting !!

Manish Sharma

Parenting Coach